This blood on my hands
by Starla Loire
Summary: Ok hopefully you all will like this chapter!!!! Lets just say Seifer admits his love for a certain someone :) R
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I own nothing so haha haha ha you can't sue me. Well I do own a Seifer doll. But HE'S MINE!!!! Ok well I know it's depressing but if you have a persistent muse like mines then you have no choice but to write. Enjoy and R&R  
  
  
  
Let me show you what it's like to be me  
  
To see the blood on your hands  
  
The blood that won't wash away  
  
The blood that forever stains my soul  
  
It was a dream I had once  
  
To be the best  
  
To prove to the world who I really was  
  
How I wanted to be remembered  
  
How I wanted them to remember me  
  
I followed my dreams  
  
Even when I knew there was no way out  
  
I still followed them  
  
I followed her until she fell  
  
Even after, I followed my heart  
  
Until he ruined it  
  
He ruined all of it  
  
He was the hero  
  
He was the protector  
  
He was everything  
  
They loved HIM  
  
Not me, but him  
  
I was the traitor  
  
I was the murderer  
  
I was the one they hated  
  
I was the one they wanted dead  
  
It was my head that they wanted on a silver platter  
  
Now as I sit alone  
  
I look at the blood on my hands  
  
And I see all my faults  
  
I see where I went wrong  
  
I see my weakness  
  
I strove to be what I hated  
  
I strove to be him  
  
I wanted to be him  
  
I wanted them to love me as they loved him  
  
He was their lion  
  
He had his pride  
  
I was nothing  
  
Yet, I had my posse  
  
But in the end, he kept his pride  
  
And in the end, I was alone  
  
As I am now  
  
Me and my Hyperion  
  
That is all that is left of my dream  
  
Just me and Hyperion  
  
I was left a broken man  
  
And a fallen knight  
  
I was left with the title of traitor  
  
I was left with no one  
  
I am alone and broken  
  
I have no more pride left  
  
That was destroyed  
  
As was my dream  
  
  
  
I sit here alone  
  
Looking at the blood on my hands  
  
And I don't see their blood anymore  
  
I see my own  
  
I bleed for them  
  
For all the hurt I have caused  
  
For all the pain I've brought to them  
  
All of them  
  
Now I sit here alone in the darkness  
  
And I know I was nothing  
  
I no longer see the blood because it's not there anymore  
  
Now I see them  
  
I hear them  
  
All those whose blood I had helped shed  
  
I can feel them around me  
  
But I won't scream out  
  
And I won't be afraid  
  
It was my choice  
  
It was my fault  
  
All I can do is wait now  
  
Wait for them to come  
  
And take me away 


	2. The Begining

*A/N: Well since I got such great reviews for the poem I figured I follow some ideas and create this short fic about Seifer. Remember I really don't own nothing and I wish I did own the characters of FF8 but a girl can wish right?? Ok well R&R and please be kind any ideas are welcomed*  
  
  
  
The entire world seemed to be watching the news reports today. Everywhere you looked, it seemed like people were glued to their monitors. Squall stopped shuffling through a stack of papers he was looking over to see what everyone else was interested in.  
  
On the monitor, he could make out the figures of three familiar faces standing before the court in Galbadia. He gazed at the taller blonde man and frowned. There stood his rival and in a strange way his friend. The man looked disheveled and tired. His once proud stance was merely a slouch; his once brilliant emerald eyes were now dull and full of emptiness. His hair was a mess and his clothes were dirty. The man and women next to him didn't look their greatest either.  
  
The camera panned over to the judge as he looked over the jury then he began to read the verdict of the trio.  
  
"Seifer Almasy your punishment for the act of treason we here by punish you to death by public execution."  
  
Almost everyone in the room held back there gasp for joy as they heard the verdict of the Sorceress's Knight's trial. Now everyone waited for the verdict upon the other two that had worked with him to kill so many.  
  
"As for the punishment of both Raijin and Fujin Kenzo we hear by sentence you to five years incarceration in the Dessert Prison and immediate expulsion from the SeeD academy of Balamb Garden."  
  
The judge rose and a group of Galbadian soldiers moved towards the trio and grabbed a hold of them. Seifer didn't struggle there was really no need to he had been defeated. He no longer held his head up in the once arrogant fashion that he was all to famous for neither did he flash the all to famous Almasy smirk. No, he just hung his head low and walked slowly towards his awaiting fate.  
  
  
  
*Flash Back Scene to Month before *  
  
  
  
"Well what do we do now Seifer we can't go back to Garden, ya know?" "Don't you think I know that Raijin? I mean fuck I'm trying ok I'm trying." Seifer looked to Fujin and some how pleading with is gaze for her to make the other man shut up. Fujin smiled and gladly took up Seifer's offer and walked over to Raijin.  
  
"QUIET", she glared at Raijin with her eye, and he just looked down at her knowing full well that if he didn't keep his mouth shut he would suffer the punishment.  
  
"All we can do for now is try and make do with what we have got it? We do not leave this hiding place during the daytime and we'll stay as far away from the cities as possible. I figure if we lay low for a while they're bound to forget about us completely", Seifer muttered to his friends trying to not sound so confused as to what to do.  
  
For the first time in his life, he felt as if he didn't have anything under his control. 


	3. Harmony

*A/N: OOOk yeah here's another chapter and just to warn you this is a rated R story so if you can't really handle it then stop reading now. As a writer, I do have a freedom to write what is beneficial to the story so if you don't like it then don't read it!!! Oh and I wanna totally thank all of you who reviewed; makes me feel good knowing you all like the story sorry for keeping you waiting but life has been really busy lately so hopefully I'll get you more chapters quicker now. Well enjoy and R&R *  
  
  
  
  
  
Squall was early to breakfast in the morning so he didn't have to wait in the long lines that usually signified the start of the day. He moved towards the front of the line, got his usual breakfast and coffee, and went to sit as far from everyone as possible. Even after the whole Ultimecia event he was still his normal anti-social self try as he may he never really fit into the whole " orphanage gang" thing. Just then Quistis and Irvine walked up and sat down.  
  
"It's a shame about what's happened to Seifer he didn't deserve that kind of punishment", Squall quietly said over his cup of coffee.  
  
"No it's not I don't think he got what he deserved I think they should make him suffer as everyone else did. I mean come on he was never a good person to begin with and he never will be" she replied snottily.  
  
"Ah come on Quisty ya don't really mean that. Seifer's an ok fella, he's not the greatest but we all have our imperfections" Irvine put in as he looked at Squall.  
  
"No he deserves everything he got and even more. Even in the orphanage, he was a rotten kid. And no one ever liked him nor did they want him I mean look at it we all got adopted except for him proving he's a waste of life."  
  
"What about me Quistis, I didn't get adopted either does that make me a waste of life?" Squall glared at her waiting to here her answer.  
  
"No but.. oh come on Squall I mean you're a better person then him. You actually made SeeD and he just continued to prove he was a failure" she tried defending herself.  
  
  
  
* * *  
  
It was growing late outside and Raijin had just left to take up his turn for nightly patrol. Seifer looked over to Fujin and smiled.  
  
"Hey Fuj, you ever wonder what it would be like for us right now if none of this had ever happened?"  
  
"Yeah sometimes", she replied looking into his emerald eyes.  
  
"What do you think about?"  
  
"Well I sometimes think.. nevermind it's stupid and besides it would never happen", she trailed off as she lay down next to the fire for warmth.  
  
"No nothings ever stupid Fuj, I mean I used to think about the future all the time. I still do. I mean I used to picture myself getting married and having some kids, maybe a house somewhere in Balamb. You know normal family type shit. What about you?"  
  
Fujin looked at Seifer strangely, "Seifer why are you asking me all of this? You never talk like this. What's going on in that head of yours?"  
  
He looked at her and moved closer. She watched him as he lay behind her and put his arm around her small form. His body was warm and felt good against her freezing body.  
  
"Well..uh. I was just thinking about it Fuj, and I mean I.well.I. I was just thinking about it I don't know. It just crossed my mind that if we are caught I might never get to have what I planned to have that's all."  
  
"Seifer, if I tell you what I used to think about the future you promise not to freak out?"  
  
"I promise."  
  
"Well. I used to think about becoming a SeeD and then marrying you and having a few kids. I always thought about having maybe a boy and a girl and raising them together. But then I knew it would never happen."  
  
"Why? You never know", he whispered in her ear as she turned her head.  
  
Seifer found this the perfect moment to show her how he really felt. He took her chin in his hand and guided her head towards his as he brushed his lips against hers. Their lips met for a brief moment in a feather light kiss. Fujin had never looked so beautiful to him as she did now by the firelight. Her platinum hair glowed from the light of the flames as she turned her body towards him. He smiled as he neared his lips towards hers once more but this time she returned his gesture. Their lips met with each other in what was now becoming a more passionate union of their souls.  
  
Fujin's heart raced as her mind frantically tried to process what was going on. This is really happening, she thought to herself as their kissing began make her body heat up with desire for him. She ran her hand through his hair as she felt his hands caressing every part of her body. She kissed him more deeply trying to fight back the urge to give into what her body screamed for.  
  
Seifer began to remove his coat and shirt taking heed that he didn't break his kiss with Fujin. The only times their lips parted was to help remove their tops but only for a brief moment. He lay her down underneath him as he slowly began to kiss a trail down her neck, moving to her collarbone, and further down. Fujin sucked in a deep breath as she felt him slowly enter her. The pain was unbearable for only a brief moment then was drowned out by the feeling of pleasure. Once again, their lips met as they moved their bodies in harmony with each other. It was like and unspoken song between the two. Both of their souls sang out to each other in an unheard melody. Fujin felt as if her body would burst from the sheer pleasure of it all. Her scent mixed with his very own. Thoughts raced through her mind of this forbidden dance they we're engaging in. With a quickened pace the two moved towards the climax of their harmony and with one final moment they were one in mind, body, and soul.  
  
Seifer lay on top of her his breathing ragged as he collected himself. For the first time, he felt no worries, no stress: all he wanted was to stop time and to remain here with her. He felt her fingers gliding through his hair as she to began to calm into a more relaxed state.  
  
"Fujin?"  
  
"Hmm"  
  
"I love you". 


End file.
